Setting my daily routine

For some people having given a daily routine gives them some sense of being able to keep things under control. It also gives them an idea of how to plan and manage their time. They are better able to keep up good habits if they have some sort of routine.

For others, a routine feels confining and boring. They like to live spontaneously. They don't like to plan every aspect of their lives.

Which type of person are you? Which type of person am I? I asked myself those questions. I used to have a routine set up and I thought that I was stuck in a rut. So now I have little routine in my life and I feel like I am not getting anything done.

I find that making good habits and breaking bad habits is harder without being set into a routine. It is easier to live with a set up schedule for doing things. It makes accomplishing tasks easier. It makes planning my time easier.

And yet I find myself hating to be stuck in a routine schedule every day or every week.

I have to figure out a way to get my mind around the good reasons to have a plan and execute that plan everyday. I have to figure out a way to get back into the habit of doing things at certain times whether I want to or not.

For far too long, I have let my emotions and feelings dictate what I have done. It only set me into a path of depression that wasn't healthy for me. Because if I didn't feel like doing anything then I simply wouldn't do it. Until it got to the point where there was no other option but to do it. And I felt like if I didn't do it then things would simply get out of hand and then I would work myself into a bad feeling about ever doing anything at all.

Somewhere along the way I lost sight of why I did the things that I did. I lost the reason to get things done like I want to. I want to be the type of person who enjoys cleaning. I want to be the type of person who likes to get her house in order. I don't want to be the kind of person who comes across as lazy or unacceptable or unsuccessful.

And so I set about in my life to try to create new daily routines. I try to do some things at the same time every day to give myself a sense of getting things done. I have tried to make lists of things that I need to do. I have decided to take on the notion of getting things done that take under five minutes to do. That clears me up for other more important things.

I have set myself on a schedule to read at the same time every day, to check my email at the same time daily, to write at the same times, to get on social media at the same time everyday.

It has not been easy for me to stick to these routines because sometimes they become difficult for me. I have tried and I have not succeeded but I try again the next day. I don't give up. I know that eventually I will get to exactly where I want to be.

Work In Progress

WORK IN PROGRESS

I am working on becoming a more positive person so that I can have a positive attitude and a positive impact on other people. I have, of late, become a negative Nelly. It is something that happens to me every year around the holidays and the New Year. 

I know that I am not the negative person that I have become lately. I know that I am not going to get there overnight. I know that I did not become negative overnight so it's not going to be am overnight story for me to get back to the positive side of life. I know that it will take time and effort to get to where I want to be.

Lately I have been feeling like the few pounds that I have gained is the worst thing in the world. I have not been able to get into the clothes that I have, and last year, I gave away alot of my fat clothes. I had lost alot of weight and I thought that maybe I would keep it off. Unfortunately, as soon as I got a boyfriend who loved to eat as much as I do, or probably more than I do, the weight slipped back on me.

And with the weight going up, the self esteem went down. Not only that but my boyfriend is not exactly a compliment machine. I am not complaining about him as I know there are other good qualities that he has. I just know that some of my self esteem in my life has come from the compliments of others.

Because I am aware that it is taking validation from others to get my self esteem up, I am trying to change that as well. I should know that I do not need validation from anyone else out there. I know that I am a smart woman. I know that I am a kind person. I know that I am an understanding person. I don't know why my self esteem comes from how other people see me. That makes no sense whatsoever.

It is called self esteem. That means it must come from within my heart and my own brain. I know that I must get things back to the way they used to be. I was well liked by everyone and I actually enjoyed being around other people. Nowadays there are days when I don't want to leave my house. There are days when I don't want to be around anyone except my dogs. And there are days when I don't want to stay in my house at all.

I have thought about the reasons why my moods fluctuate and I have found that sometimes it is all about what is going on inside my head. It is the thoughts that I have. It is the procrastination of it all. I want my house to be a certain way and to be clean but I don't get up and actually do any of those things. I just think about how I want to get them done.

Procrastination and laziness have become part of who I am the older I have gotten. I think part of it is because of an accident I had years ago. Before that car accident, ten years ago this April, I was always on the go. I was always doing something, cleaning something, cooking something, or studying something. I was also extremely stressed out and high strung. I was not really happy either. And yet here I am now, completely the opposite, and I am not happy here either. That tells me that I am out of balance somewhere.

After my accident and the injuries I sustained, I wasn't able to physically do the things that I had been doing. I had to get used to needing help to walk, put clothes on, bathe, etc. I had a very difficult time with all of those things but chronic pain tends to let you know when you can or cannot do something. I was so young when the accident happened, and for someone in her middle 20s it was hard to no longer be able to do just basic tasks, much less things that I wanted to do like go walking or shopping or cleaning or going to visit people.

In time I was able to get back to where I could do basic tasks but the pain from sitting or standing too long still bothers me. Ten years later and I am still unable to do many things that I could do years ago, but now I have learned my physical limitations. I know that I am not able to sit or stand for long periods. I know that I must exercise regularly to keep my back healthier. I know that I cannot gain a tremendous amount of weight because it is harder on my back than on someone with a healthy back.

Because it took time for me to get to this point then I know that it will take time for me to get back to a more normal life. But how do I even go about doing that? When nothing but negative thoughts plague my mind these days how exactly do I get back to a positive frame of mind?

I have read and written articles about the power of positive thinking but I still find myself plagued with negative thoughts and therefore negative attitudes towards things in my life.

I am tired of being this way and yet I have not found the perfect solution for my issues. I am still working on it. And that's why I consider myself to be a work in progress and not a finished masterpiece. But I am still working on it and that's what really matters.

Genuine happiness comes from within

Genuine Happiness Comes from Within

Life is not perfect for anyone. It is not always sunshine and flowers. It is not always rainbows and roses. Many people think that happiness will come with the next car, house, job, or other material possession.  But that is not true. 

True happiness comes from within.  It is a state of mind that you find when you become grateful about what you already have in your life.  There are always positive things that you can see in any situation. 

We often look at others and we think they have the most perfect lives.  We compare our own lives to theirs and find that our own fall short.  Comparing yourself to someone else is never going to bring you happiness.

If you want to find true happiness,  then you need to start by looking at yourself.  Why are you not happy with your life?  What would it take to make you happy?  Do you have good relationships with other people?  What is holding you back from being happy?

Most likely what is holding you back is your own mind.  If you can get over yourself and your own thoughts and negativity then you are on your way to starting to become a happier person. 

How do we become happier?  One of the first things that you have to do is -  Love Yourself.  Accept yourself.  Sure you are probably not perfect,  but who is?  Even thought you are not perfect,  you have to accept the fact that you're not. We are all imperfect.  And that is okay. 

Despite not being perfect, we must accept our imperfections.  If there is something about yourself that is bothering you,  then you need to figure out what it is and take measures to improve yourself. 

Despite realizing that you have things about yourself that need improvement, you also must be able to be content with what you do have in your life.  Are you content with the job that you have,  the way you look, with your relationships, with your home, with your car, and other things that you now have? You must appreciate what you have now in order to feel better about your life.

You have to decide that you are a happy person in order to be a happy person.  Today is a good day to have a good day,  is it not?  Why wait until something else happens or changes in your life before you decide that you want to be happy? Nobody is constantly happy without making a conscious decision to feel happy. 

Every time you exert the effort to improve your life and yourself then you are coming closer and closer to genuine happiness.  You have to constantly try to improve your quality of life -  clean your room,  take care of your sick pets,  make an effort to do something nice for someone else, lose weight, learn something, etc.  You should always be in a state of constant improvement -  because we never really "get"  to where we want to be.  We should always strive,  every single day,  to be better than we were yesterday. 

That's all that we can really do -  is try to be better than we were yesterday. 

As long as you can do that then you learn to become a happier person. 

What makes your soul happy?

In the past six months, I have been on a true spiritual journey where I have been  trying to find myself - what I am and who I want to be. I have been trying to find what it is that I want to do with my life.

Sometimes I do not feel like I have grown at all until I spend time with people who say they see such a tremendous change in me, in my attitude, in my outlook, in my positive mindset. People who don't spend alot of time with me on a daily basis are probably more likely to see the changes in me than those I am around everyday.

I have become more confident, happier and healthier. People want to know what changed me, as if it is a pill that they can take and be changed overnight and it is not.

It has taken me a lot of time and effort and work to make the changes in my life that others see. But perhaps I can give others an inspiration or an insight into how they can go on their own journey and find more about themselves.

So perhaps that is where my passion lies. Perhaps helping other people is my calling. I have an affinity for working with people, for making conversation with perfect strangers, for making others feel at ease and comfortable.

Maybe in discussing my own journey and what I have experienced will help others to have some experiences of their own.

So that's where I shall begin. I have been a writer since I could first pick up a pen. I know that I can find a way to discuss my own life in an entertaining and rewarding way. I am sure that I will be able to make a difference, perhaps using only the power of my words. That would make my soul happy.